a christmas miracle

Prologue: This post is published on both of my blogs – on The I Love You Song and here on Segovia. I would not normally do that but this post is a special one to me, part of our family “archive” and I really wanted to share it as widely as I can. As I write this post on Saturday December 15, I am all too aware that on the other side of the world, in Newtown, Connecticut, there are many families experiencing unimaginable loss in the wake of the school shooting tragedy. My heart and my sorrow is with them. 


The Batsman has never really liked Santa. Terrified is probably a better word to use. We have one poor quality photo of Santa and the Batsman together taken when our boy was just a baby. Even in that photo he looks frightened.

The Batsman’s autism diagnosis brought with it a greater understanding for me of where so much of his terror was coming from. It was then and still is now, about change to routine, feeling overwhelmed, strong sensory responses to noise, crowds and chaos and a very big fear of new or unknown things. We have tried a few times in the past to have a Santa photo taken but each time it ended in great stress, tears and meltdowns. While I would have loved a Santa photo, especially once little brother Bowler came along, there was no way I wanted to cause the Batsman distress to get it.

In the grand scheme of things, a Santa photo is probably a small thing to hanker after, but it was one of those things I felt like was a bit of a childhood rite of passage, a memory to look back upon and smile at. My little flame of longing for a photo of my boys together with Santa kept flickering but I had largely given up hope of ever getting there.

A few weeks ago our local shopping centre advertised a new initiative – “Sensitive Santa” – special booked sessions with Santa for kids on the autism spectrum. I decided that we would have one more try at it through this program and the flame burned a tiny bit brighter. As part of “Sensitive Santa” we would have a 20 minute private session with Santa in the early morning before the Christmas chaos of the shopping centre began at 9am. The shopping centre customer service team were exceptional, ringing beforehand to confirm our time and “find out a bit more about the Batsman so they could brief Santa”.

We did a little bit of preparation with the Batsman (but not so much as to overwhelm him) – we read some stories, we practised some things he might say to Santa and we watched some YouTube videos of other kids meeting Santa. The morning arrived and off we went at 8am for our “Sensitive Santa” timeslot. I could write on and on here about what happened but the pictures tell the story much better than I could.

The Batsman took his time to get used to his (quiet and calm) surroundings, he chatted to Santa and showed him his shoes with the flashing lights, he told him what he wanted for Christmas and when we said goodbye, he HUGGED him.

I cried a lot. Tears of so much happiness leaked continually from my eyes that day. And they still are. The long wished for miracle of a photo of both boys with Santa came our way along with the very grateful reflection on just how far our Batsman has come in the last three years.

In the bigger picture, I was incredibly moved by the thought and care that Highpoint Shopping Centre put into this initiative. There was sensitivity and respect and a very real commitment to putting one of those “childhood rites of passage” within reach of families who love someone on the spectrum.

Happy Christmas from my family to you and yours.

Disclaimer: This post is my own description and opinion of our “Sensitive Santa” experience at Highpoint Shopping Centre. They did not ask me to write this post. It’s just written by a happy mum.

How it feels to let go of some stuff

Back when I wrote this post I was feeling incredibly overwhelmed and depressed and anxious.
Life and everything I had taken on was weighing heavily. It was all too much.

I have been doing some regular work with one of those professional mental health people and together we have put in place some strategies for dealing with the anxious when it comes. One of the big tasks that I knew was there to be done was to downsize my commitments. I knew that I really needed to stop saying yes to everything, start saying "no" or "I don't have the time to commit to that project".

I have quit my part time job.
I have finished my two year role as secretary of the kinder.
I have said "no" to other requests that have come my way.
I have limited the number of nights out that I have in a week (although that gets tricky come the silly season).
I have not missed my twice a week pilates class.
We went on a farmstay holiday to one of the most beautiful places I have ever seen.
I am making a conscious effort to slow down and be in those moments with the boys instead of worrying constantly about the next thing on the to-do list.
I am spending more time doing the things I love - cooking and reading and hanging out in the backyard. Working with beautiful food and creating dishes in my own kitchen is a true place of happiness and feels like a completely valid therapy/meditative experience.
My Christmas plans are in place and they are smaller and more achievable than the craziness I came up with last year. Home cooked Christmas presents here we come.

All of this has helped so much.
I am calmer. I am more present. The anxiety is a smaller beast. When it visits, I am more able to cope. There is still a way to go though. I have to watch myself because my personality regularly leads me to a place of saying "yes" too often and ending up over-committed and miserable.

But for now, where I am feels good.

new neighbours

They're new neighbours but they have been in the neighbourhood for a while and anyway, it feels like we have known them forever.

There is an ease in the ebb and flow of life living next door to this beautiful little family of three.

The side gate is open and a precious two year old tinkerbell tiptoes in to our backyard now and again to steal a jump on the trampoline or five minutes playing trains with our boys.

A big black dog has been well and truly adopted and hours are spent patting.

The spoils of cooking and produce are shared and containers of deliciousness are passed across the fence and back again.

The difficult hours of dinner, bath and bedtime are easier when you can call out to someone else facing the same trials next door.

Having new neighbours, might seem like a relatively small thing in the grand scheme.
Small or not, it feels like I have won the lottery.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

We have a winner

Getting up close and personal with a tuba after our recent visit to an MSO performance

I had a giveaway on Segovia the other day.
The winner of the Melbourne Symphony Orchestra Classic Kids Sing tickets for a family of 4 is......

High Country Gourmet

I have sent you an email and look forward to arranging your tickets.
Thank you to those who entered.
Happy Wednesday one and all.

Sunday catch up

It's been difficult to stay true to Blogvember this weekend. It gets like that in November, better weather, the opportunity of social occasions, the looming Christmas beast.

This weekend has had some challenges but it has largely been beautiful.

Pilates. Swimming lessons. Twitter. A trip to see the Melbourne Symphony Orchestra do a Classic Kids performance. The most amazing turkey schnitzels and coleslaw. Washing. Twitter. A quick blog post. Sunday drive all the way to "Day out with Thomas" at Puffing Billy Railway in the hills. Cooking some gorgeous flatbreads stuffed with chicken, spinach, feta and chickpeas. A well-earned beer. Couch time and a blog post. Twitter. Caramel custard (I heart you Thermomix).

And there will be lots of sleep, any time now.

I hope you had a lovely weekend too. Go well.

Food for Friday

It's Friday. I am tired. It has been a huge week and I figure, what else do you need on a Friday except some pictures of beautiful food? So I thought I would share some of the gorgeous food we ate while we were on our recent farm stay holiday near Bright.

Here you go. So much deliciousness from me to you. Happy Friday.

the most delicious berries at the Bright Berry Farm

a gorgeous breakfast - granola by The Misadventurous Maker

loveliest burger I ever did eat from The Myrtleford Butter Factory

cute Bowler with nuggets and chips at the pub

divine scrambled eggs and salsa from the Rail Trail Cafe

more Rail Trail Cafe yum - egg, salmon, bagel

fell.in.love. with coral lee cafe in bright - lemonade and cheesecake anyone?

more coral lee - when I grow up i would love a cafe like this one

I made these ones - caramelised onion, avocado and cream cheese tarts

Dear Friends

Dear Beautiful Friends,

Thank you for opening your home to us on Melbourne Cup Day.

Thank you for the beautiful food and the opportunity to contribute to an amazing feast for all of us.

Thank you for your generous and gracious hospitality which extended through not one but two meals. Seven whole hours of a house full of people.

Thank you for loaning the Bowler some trains to play with and sustain him on the journey home. His day ended peacefully and perfectly.

Thank you for always creating a space that welcomes the Batsman and encourages him to be himself. He had the time of his life.

Thank you for being the friends you are to all of us. We are beyond lucky to have you in our lives. It makes us so happy to watch our boys play together.


Love,

Us
xoxo

The treechange dream

Imagine a place where there are four distinct seasons. A summer, autumn, winter and spring - each with their own contribution to a stunning landscape.

Imagine a place where you can walk for a few kilometres and usually not see another person or car, maybe just a cow or a few sheep.

Imagine a place where the kids can just run and be outside for hours. They bottlefeed a calf, chase sheep, giggle at a kookaburra and eat like horses. Their favourite thing to do is chucking rocks in the creek.

Sounds perfect doesn't it?

We have just returned from a farmstay holiday, our second in two years at the same lovely farm. I go to this place and I can feel my whole body unwind its springs, the tension draining. I watch my boy let go of much of the anxiety that autism has him carry around. I go to this town and I want to live there.

I have long carried a little dream about living in the country. It's something I think about from time to time. I can picture myself in a little farm house baking a pie with the eggs my chooks laid, just like the cliche of all cliches . On a holiday like the one we have just had, I am utterly seduced by the lifestyle, the landscape, living close to the source of the produce we eat, all of it. It is usually by about day three that I start to look at the real estate websites or linger outside the window of the agents in the main street of town, checking out what's on offer.

Of course, a treechange is a much more complex undertaking than just packing up and going. If only it were that simple. Employment, housing, schools and services are the big ticket items that need some big thinking and planning for a move like this to happen successfully. It's always at these big ones that I stop in my tracks and the dream drifts away. In my heart of hearts, the Batsman and autism and all that that requires, in services and expertise and support, is what puts up the roadblock. The services are just not there for children with disabilities in many rural and regional areas. There are some exceptions but only a few. Every child in Australia should have access to the services that are available to the kids in the city but the tyranny of distance and cost means that many of the services are just not viable in smaller towns and regions. Rural families of kids with additional needs drive thousands of kilometres to get what their child needs and in that very driving, other aspects of family life are made harder. Not fair.

When it comes down to it and no matter how much I think I might like to be baking that pie in a country oven, I just couldn't make a decision that means the Batsman gets less - less specialised support, less resources, less. For him, I want it all. The pies will be made in our inner suburban kitchen for now.

And the dream wanders away somewhere over in that back paddock.
Until next time.

If you would like to know more about the farm where we stayed go here. If you would like to know more about the beautiful village of Bright in Victoria go here or here.

Melbourne Symphony Orchestra Giveaway - You know you want to SING!

We love a bit of a sing at our place.
There is singing along with Play School and with Giggle and Hoot.
We always sing the Goodnight Song with the boys. It's part of the night time ritual.
There is some singing in the shower and sometimes in the car.
Singing gets us to our happy place, usually a little more quickly than a chat.
The boys singing and music tastes are broadening as they get older.
And I admit to being more than a little chuffed when I went to kiss the Batsman goodnight in his bed the other night. He had fallen asleep, but not before he had begun playing the Black Eyed Peas in his bedside CD player.

Do you like to sing at your house?

If you do, and you are based in Melbourne, then this giveaway is for you.

I have a family pass for 2 adults and 2 children to attend the Melbourne Symphony Orchestra Classic Kids program, SING! I have been to a couple of the MSO performances for kids and they really are a fabulous way to make music part of your children's lives.

Date: December 1
Venue: Iwaki Auditorium at the ABC Southbank Centre in Melbourne.
Time: your choice of 10am, 11:30am or 1:30pm sessions.

More details about SING!:
"One of Australia’s pre-eminent conductors and a passionate advocate of the importance of singing in a child’s life, Richard Gill, and singers from Victorian Opera, will join forces with the Melbourne Symphony Orchestra to lead a stimulating musical program for children which will explore the joy of singing and inspire aural imagination through song. "

If you would like to win and go have a SING!, all you have to do is:

1. You must be in Melbourne!
2. Leave a comment below telling me what you sing at your house. 
3. Follow Segovia - here or on Facebook
4. Ensure that you are contactable by leaving an email address with your comment or via your profile.

The giveaway is open until midnight on Monday November 12, 2012.
The winner will be drawn randomly. Prize value is $50.

I am a Gemini so let's see if I can complete Blogvember

 

 

“Geminis have a dual nature and therefore seem changeable, sometimes reckless and fickle. They tend to do many different things superficially. Totally flexible and adaptable, they can work at multiple tasks simultaneously but they may lack persistence” Source: Here

Hmmm.

My life is littered with quite a bit of stuff that I haven’t persisted with. Hobbies are the main offender, in particular, craft, for which I have great desire but little talent. It always looks so much better in my mind’s eye than in reality. Cross stitch anyone? Who wants to make a Christmas wreath? I have the materials stashed in a cupboard somewhere. I also confess to never having managed to finish one of those “photo a day” challenges run by the very clever Fat Mum Slim. There are quite a few unfinished books littered around the house on the shelf too. It seems that I have all good intentions but I don’t always follow through. Food projects, though, are something I always complete. Go figure.

So when I saw my friend Naomi was going to take on the Blogvember challenge of posting every day for the whole month I thought “what’s another unfinished project between friends” “why not give it a crack?”.

So here I am.

I have two blogs, this one and The I Love You Song where I write about our autism adventures with our very gorgeous Batsman. For Blogvember I am going to alternate between the two blogs. One day, I will be here. The next day I will be over there. I hope you will join me and hop around.

And, if you are one of those people who does manage to finish projects, feel free to give me advice and a good kick up the backside if you notice me wavering.

I would really like to finish this one.

PS: I am going all out and doing #FMSPhotoADay too. If you want to see how far this Gemini can go you can find me here or here.

Image via WeHeartIt

We

When life slows down, as it has for me these past couple of days, there is time to think. Without the racing around and sticking to a schedule and the daily minutiae of life, there is time to reflect.  This week's recurrent theme swimming around in my brain seems to be friendship. Must we spend time together in the flesh to be friends, to care about one another, to form a community? Nope. At least, not in the world I inhabit.

Two lovely people I know from Twitter are facing the unthinkable this week. They met and fell in love on Twitter, built a life together and now they prepare to say goodbye, many many many days, weeks and years before their time.

There is so much sadness felt by their twitter community and i have watched and participated as many who know these two beautiful people "virtually" try to comfort and hug them and each other. You just know how many tears are falling behind the computer screens. It is devastating. It is heartbreaking. It is so very human. Most of these people have not met beyond Twitter. And there is love everywhere. 

I have been on Twitter for a few years now. It has only been in the last short while that it has started to feel like home. Now it feels like a place I can express myself and let others see who I am and how I think on a daily basis. When I say "my friend from Twitter" or "I met her on Twitter", I get some strange looks. Twitter folk are used to that. There is a natural suspicion of "online" relationships which is probably fairly reasonable. But the people I have "met" on Twitter are warm, funny, compassionate, intelligent, generous & wise. It is my privilege and my pleasure to call myself part of that. And it doesn't matter that I haven't met most of them.  When I think about this group of people, I am so proud to say"We" and count myself among them.

We exchange information. We banter. We tell jokes. We link each other up. We ask for and receive support. We problem solve. We swap recipes. We show each other photos. We admire each other's children and cats and dogs. We share the big ideas. And the little ones. We giggle at absurdity. We come together for a cause. We donate. We rally. We rant. We wait for tiny babies to be born. We laugh. We cry. We mourn those who leave us. We love. 

It is ever so real and it is ever so beautiful. We come together like this on Twitter and the world becomes a little bit more like the kind of place I want for my children.

Inspired by T & M xx

In my garden

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

How do YOU say no?

The overwhelm is here again.
It visits too often. Unwelcome, unyielding. Buffeting and rough on the mind.
I wish it away but wishing never quite does it.
I know that there is too much on, too much on my plate. I know this.
But what I don't know is how to take it down a notch and let everything in my head calm down.
My to-do list has reached magnificent proportions and it is both my friend and my mortal enemy.

The big thing I do know is that I am not very good at saying "no". I am a capable gal and I have lots of skills. I am someone that others look to, to help, to lead, to be involved.
So why can't I say no sometimes and keep my commitments at manageable levels?

Do you have any suggestions for me? How do you manage it?
I suspect it might have something to do with this.....(as seen on a recent visit to Abbotsford Convent).

Help please.

Thomas the Tank Engine birthday cake, a fruit rainbow and other bits and pieces

As I mentioned, the Bowler turned three this week. 

The Birthday Boy - a little bemused by all the fuss

I love planning for children's birthday parties.

Here is the Thomas the Tank Engine birthday cake and a few other bits and pieces which helped us to celebrate on the day.

The cake

More cake

Cake - aerial shot :)

Chocolate nougat cheesecake - I heart you Thermomix

Chocolate and ginger muffins; lemon and sugar muffins

The fruit rainbow

Lolly cups

Yum!

My favourite - marshmallow pops

Happy birthday beautiful boy.

Three

The Bowler turned three on Tuesday.
My littlest. My last baby. My wee boy. He is three.
I am so very thankful for the presence of this gorgeous boy in all our lives.
He is loud. He is verbose. He is loving, affectionate and has a strong sense of who he is.
Rowdy at times, cuddly at others.
He has often, by necessity, played a little of the second fiddle role as we came to grips with what big brother Batsman needed and what autism meant for all of us. He has taken this, mostly, in his stride. At our weekly sports program, you will regularly hear him yell to his big brother from the sidelines..."good boy...you are doing a great job".

Thank you gorgeous boy for playing the pushing and pulling, the cheering and encouraging role with your big brother. His life is immeasurably better for having you around to inspire him to communicate, to negotiate and to love. You are growing into a wonderful little human who clearly will lead and inspire and push others around you to reach potential. Our very own Leo the lion, leading and encouraging are part of who you are.

Happy birthday, my beautiful boy. I love you more than words can say.

Reach

That's me in the middle of the shot, 9kms in.

Just over a week ago, I ran in a ten kilometre fun run for the first time in my life.

Just over a year ago, I could not run for more than a couple of hundred metres without stopping in pain or being out of breath.

Just over a year ago (fifteen months to be exact), I weighed twenty one kilograms more than I weigh now.

Why am I telling you all this? It's not about "look at me" or to brag about achieving these goals. The thing I want to tell you is that just over a year ago, I genuinely thought that these goals were IMPOSSIBLE for me. I genuinely believed that losing the weight and running for ten kilometres were NEVER dreams I could achieve.

To finish the run was an amazing feeling. The Captain brought the Batsman and the Bowler to be there at the finish line. My mum and dad came too. The sun shone through the cold air. In the process of completing the run, I raised $2400 for the autism early intervention organisation who have done such incredible work with the Batsman. Like I said, amazing feeling.

When I think back to how I felt a year ago and try to identify what it was that was the starting point of working towards these goals, the only word that comes to mind is "reach". I was able to reach forward and try and somehow with a bit of blind, clueless faith, know that I could move forward.

That's all I can come up with. Nothing too profound. Reach, reach, reach.

Are you reaching for any goals right now?

Hallmark winners

Thank you all for entering the giveaway. The winners (drawn randomly) are Kate and Ellie.

Congratulations! I will be in touch to get a postal address so your prize can be mailed your way!

I'm over at Autism: In Our Own Words today.

Today I am blogging over at Autism: In Our Own Words.
I have written a post in words and pictures about "What Autistic Looks Like".
Go meet my beautiful Batsman here.

Smiles all round and a Hallmark giveaway you WILL want to win

Of late, I have browsed in our local news agency and thought that greeting cards are a little bit expensive. You know, for a bit of cardboard with a picture on it. To save our coins, we have done a bit of card making over here in the past - kids drawings, my appalling scissor skills and some glitter. You know the drill. And they always look....ok. Thrifty and ok.

No candles were harmed in the production of this Hallmark card

But sometimes when you send a card or give a card with a gift you just need something a little bit more special. A "wowee buckle tee" factor if you like. When the nice folk at Hallmark sent me some of their new "interactive" cards, I learnt all I really needed to know about them in the two minutes after they arrived in my letterbox.

When we opened the envelope and looked through the cards, my 5 year old Batsman simply could not contain his giggles at the dancing Carmen Miranda on one card, the Crocodile Rock music played on another and most of all the card with the "push button" dancing mustache. The Hallmark interactive cards light up, jiggle, giggle, pop up enormously and dance. And they made my boy smile and giggle. So knowing that we had smiles all round, I can only imagine what it will be like to be a recipient of one by post.

Yes, the mustache dances

And, just to increase the level of smiles around here, Hallmark have provided very generous giveaway packs for 2 lucky Segovia readers. Each prize pack includes a selection of cards from the interactive range, the licensed Disney range, the polka-dots range, and classic range, as well as a double forever friends CD featuring tracks from The Script, Michael Buble, Delta Goodrem and many others, AND a Hallmark recordable storybook. The pack is valued at over $115, and is basically a years worth of cards. Um, wow. It's a great prize and think of the time and money you will save on not buying glitter to make your own.

So here is what you need to do to win:

1. Leave a comment below telling me something good about your day. Share the happy.
2. Follow Segovia - here or on FB
3. Ensure that you are contactable by leaving an email address with your comment or via your profile.

The giveaway is open until midnight on July 9, 2012. There are two prize packs, each valued at $115. Winners drawn randomly.

Disclaimer: These are my personal opinions. I received a selection of Hallmark interactive cards to enable me to review them. You lucky people get the opportunity to win the two big prizes.

Big4 Bellarine - the real deal

I haven't done much work with brands.
I have kind of tinkered around the edges.
And mainly I have told myself it is because I just don't have time.
Sure there is a part of me that likes a little bit of free product here and there. But when it gets down to it, I think the real reason is that a lot of the time I find all the marketing mumbo jumbo a bit uncomfortable and disconcerting, especially if I feel like me (or my readers) are having some sales pitch rammed somewhere it doesn't need to be.

But every now and then, something comes along and you know it's the real deal. No bull. No ramming anything anywhere. Just the real deal.

Last weekend I had the great fortune of being one of 40 mums invited to a sleepover event at Big4 Bellarine Holiday Park just a little way from Geelong. Lots of others have written posts about what happened on the weekend so if you want to read about that go here and here. Suffice to say we were well fed, watered and pampered. It was a lovely break.

I was particularly impressed by the way Sophie, one of the co-owners of the park, told us the story of how their wonderful park came into being. She told the story with thought, honesty, grace and the fabulous sense of humour of someone who has put it all on the line to get a business going and is giving it a real crack. Hearing the story was one of my favourite parts of the whole weekend. I really truly love it when people's authenticity shines through and with Sophie it shone brightly.

I have booked a little winter break for later in the year at Big4 Bellarine. I am really excited about showing the Captain, the Batsman and the Bowler around all the fun facilities they have. I have had a good chat with Sophie about autism and how that affects our family and how it can make holidays a bit tricky. She really listened.

I already knew Big4 Bellarine was the real deal after my weekend experience but you know when I really knew?

I knew when a little package arrived this week. It was personally addressed to the Batsman....a social story to help him understand where he is going on our winter break and what it will be like. It's this kind of stuff that makes the big difference. The Batsman loved it. You should have seen his face.

Yep. The real deal.

Final words: I had a great time at Big4 Bellarine. I was not paid or asked to write this post. I just wanted to share something real. Really. xx

Anzac biscuits into autumn crumble



I made Anzac biscuits during last week.

I made loads of them.

Given my propensity to "over-cater", I clearly made more than we could possibly eat.

So when it came to thinking about a Sunday night dessert for the Captain and me, a little re-invention possibility came to mind.  A couple of apples, a pear and two handfuls of frozen blueberries completed the picture.



I crushed up the leftover Anzac biscuits and mixed them with a few oats and seeds.

The pears and apples were peeled and chopped and tossed with the blueberries, some cinnamon and a spoonful of brown sugar.

Fruit on the bottom. Crumble on top.

Half an hour in the oven and voila.

We were so keen to eat it that I forgot to take a picture of it cooked.

For the record, we ate it with a lovely dollop of Greek yoghurt.

Gourmet Girlfriend who is one of my food heroes has written a post about using leftovers today. Go read! And thanks GG for the inspiration to post this.