easy Lightning McQueen birthday cake - cars, cars, cars

This is a birthday cake from last year in our house. Let's just say we went through a significant "Cars" period. I made this cake for the Bowler's 4th birthday. He adored it.

Kids birthday cakes don't have to be overly complex to have impact. This cake was two round cakes wedged together to make an "eight" or track shape. I smoothed buttercream icing all over it (the Bowler wanted purple) and then formed the track using "dirt" made from crushed up biscuits.

Oreos all the way around the edge give a wheel look to it all. And let me say that "freckle" lollies make fabulous track barriers and fencing. A little bit of piped on green grass, some white track lines and some of the Bowlers very own "Cars" and here is our amazing and delicious race track.

Our boy's eyes lit up when he saw it and the sugar rush was long and hysterical.

Thomas will most likely always be number one though!

it's his turn

The Bowler was 6 months old when his big brother’s autism diagnosis came. 

He has lived his baby and toddlerhood with a house full of therapists, the juggling of appointments and schedules and parents who were often stressed and distracted. He has never known life without any of it.

Even with all the distractions, he has grown into an engaged, sometimes rowdy and loving little whirlwind. He loves life and he loves his family.

This year, his beloved big brother is off to school on his next adventure. The Bowler has an exciting year ahead too – he is beginning kinder and he is attending a pre-school sports program which he adores.

He will have a whole lot more time to hang out with his mum, to drink milkshakes and eat gingerbread in cafes, to run around without time limits in playgrounds and parks, to wander around the zoo and the museum.

After almost three years of being just a little in the shadow of his big brother and autism, it’s his turn.

It’s his turn.

Thomas the Tank Engine birthday cake, a fruit rainbow and other bits and pieces

As I mentioned, the Bowler turned three this week. 

The Birthday Boy - a little bemused by all the fuss

I love planning for children's birthday parties.

Here is the Thomas the Tank Engine birthday cake and a few other bits and pieces which helped us to celebrate on the day.

The cake

More cake

Cake - aerial shot :)

Chocolate nougat cheesecake - I heart you Thermomix

Chocolate and ginger muffins; lemon and sugar muffins

The fruit rainbow

Lolly cups

Yum!

My favourite - marshmallow pops

Happy birthday beautiful boy.

Treasuring the moment

We had one of those cosy days here today. It's very cold and the day was just right for me and the boys to snuggle and watch ABC for Kids on the couch in between the Batsman's therapy sessions. We ate toasted cheese sandwiches, yoghurt, grapes and ANZAC biscuits. While we munched, I watched them.  I watched them in that misty, sentimental way that comes when I slow down enough to recognise it. Love, love, love my boys.

This was one of those moments. A moment to treasure.

Next year the Batsman will go to school. Our routine, our lunchtimes together will shift significantly. It will be the Bowler and me having lunch some days. And on the days the Bowler heads to kinder or child care, it will be just me.

I know this change is going to take some adjustment. Like the plan ahead girl I am, I'm preparing myself early.

But for now, on this cold day that is bringing us closer to winter with each raindrop, all I am doing is treasuring the moment.

Image via We Heart It

You never know the impact your blog post will have

I read a lot of blog posts. Loads of them.

I love being able to be a little inside the minds of others. I love to read about what happens in their worlds and draw inspiration from their insights. I hope too, that ocasionally I can offer insight back in return.

As a parent, and particularly as a parent of a child with special needs, it is an absolute gift to have access to the often wise words from our global internet village of mums and dads. Parenting can be an isolating gig and sometimes it strikes me as a wee bit sad that the actual, real life village is often not there and for many of us, there is this, blog and social media land, to make these connections. But no matter because I reckon the universe gives you what you need when you need it. Perhaps where it comes from is not important.

Every now and then, I read a blog post that literally shifts something in me. A post that connects with me, speaks to me, takes some issue I have been struggling with into a new paradigm. That happened to me the day before yesterday when I came across this post. Ruth from Gourmet Girlfriend writes sagely in the post about fussy eating and her approach to feeding her kids - and when I started to read, I sat up and really took notice. She knows stuff - she has five, yes, 5 boys. So run away now and read the post and come back if you like...

I cried when I read it because I realised just how much I have been beating myself up about what the Batsman and the Bowler will and won't eat. The Batsman's sensory sensitivities (thank you autism, not), add a layer of complication to the eating caper that at many a dinner time has figuratively brought me to my parenting knees. I'm not going to air that pain here because I just don't want to give it any more power.

So I read Ruth's post and since I did I have been:

• reading cookbooks and food magazines and getting re-inspired about things I can cook for us to eat as a family.
• consciously reminding myself to let go of the stress and self flogging that for such a long time has gone with feeding the boys.
• feeling freed up
• going back and reading the post a few more times!

Something has shifted in my mind about this whole issue. It feels great.
Tonight, for the first time ever, yes EVER, the Batsman ate pieces of chicken breast that hadn't been chopped, minced, hidden or otherwise kitchen modified. He ate beautiful, crumbed and seasoned chunks of chicken breast. He chewed and chatted and swallowed without angst or upset.

It was amazing. And I can't help but think that perhaps Ruth's post had more than a little to do with it. The universe gives you what you need.

And what I want to say most of all is that we all have this most amazing opportunity when we blog, to put words out there for others to read and be inspired by. You never know the impact your blog post will have.









Image via we heart it

It has begun, the dance of the popit and the hipsy

They adore each other these two.
As each of their language skills develops they are beginning to have conversations with each other.
It's a whole new world for them.
Hilariously entertaining.
Most of the time, I know what they are talking about and the conversations cover topics like "how are you Batsman?, I'm good Bowler, how are you?" and "where's mummy? ummmmmm, she's in the laundry" and "can I have some of your sultanas please Bowler? nope".

These past few weeks, it has begun.
That secret language between siblings where the parents have no freaking idea what some of the words mean.
It's their code.
And it is oh so very funny. There are giggles and smiles all round when the secret words make an appearance.

So if anyone out there can help me out and tell me....

• what "popit" is and why daddy's gone to get some and....
• what it means when someone is "hipsy".

I'd be ever so grateful.

Have your children made up some great words? Share them with me!

Stay at home mummy guilt

I had an attack of the guilts this week.

Much is said about the guilt working mums feel as they strive to balance everything and do the best for family and children and careers. I am not sure if we talk so much about "stay at home mummy guilt" so much. Do we? If we do I think I may have missed these conversations.

The Bowler was off color, off his food and had a tummy upset from Monday to Wednesday this week. He was cranky and whiny one minute and sunny and chirpy the next. I couldn't predict the next thirty seconds in our household and it was utterly exhausting. When Thursday arrived and with it the much loved 2 day stint the Bowler usually spends at child care, I wasn't 100% per sure he was ok. It was probably somewhere in the 80 - 90% vicinity.

But I sent him.

I sent him to child care in spite of not feeling sure of how well he was. I was desperate for a chance to collect my thoughts, deal with house stuff (hello, 23,000 baskets of washing) and spend some time at kinder with the Batsman.

And then I felt guilty. All day.
The guilt ate at me, even as I managed to finish a much longed for cup of tea in peace.
Guilt. Guilt. Guilt.
Guilty for wanting and needing to be away from him. Guilty for taking the risk that he would get through the day without being unwell. Guilty for feeling relieved as the Captain strapped him into the car for the child care drop off.
I stifled thoughts of going to pick him up three hours early.
The pit in the bottom of my stomach stayed with me.

Guilt is such a negative emotion isn't it? And you know what, when I went to pick him up at 4:30pm, the staff told me he'd had a wonderful day. He was fine.

I, on the other hand, was a wee bit wrung out from all the inner angst. Glass of wine with your guilt anyone?

Hoot the Owl birthday cake in pictures

The Bowler turned two on Sunday.
He adores Giggle and Hoot on ABC for Kids so the birthday cake was always going to be a great big Hoot the Owl.

I had big plans to do a step by step of how to make a Hoot the Owl cake but time restrictions over here at the Pavillion have meant that the pictures will have to tell the story.

Hoot hoot.

Happy Birthday Bowler Boy

Bold

Boisterous

Funny

Feisty

Affectionate

Chatty

Two years ago you joined our family.

We are so happy you did.

We all love you madly, especially your big brother.

Happy Birthday Bowler Boy

What the Bowler said

This boy is almost two.

This boy is full of cheek and daring and an absolutely irrepressible enthusiasm for his ever expanding environment.

This boy is affectionate, sociable and funny.

This boy has a growing sense of humour, loves a laugh and loves his big brother even more.

And he never, ever stops talking.
As he gets older, the words that come out of him keep getting funnier. I am endlessly entertained.

One day this week he woke up from his afternoon nap and he was very cranky. He was cranky in the "do not look at me, speak to me or touch me" way that toddlers all seem to have perfected in their repertoire.
I got him dressed and in the car to head out for a coffee while the Batsman completed the last hour of his therapy session. The whining from the Bowler persisted as I started the engine. I turned to him and said "Have you got your cranky pants on?"

What he said (with dangerous looking frown): "No mummy, got jeans on".

Ok then.

In a split second (reality)

"Because in a split second. It's gone." - Ayrton Senna


We had a bit of a close call here this afternoon.
Dont freak out. Keep reading. Everyone is ok.
But it can happen in a split second.

The Captain was mowing the lawn in our front yard this afternoon.
I was inside cooking, talking to a visiting friend and looking after the Batsman and the Bowler.
The Batsman was watching the Captain through the front window, the Bowler was there too.
I could hear them.
I heard the front security door click and assumed it was the Captain coming back inside.
Wrong.
The Batsman had opened the door to "go and see what Daddy's doing" and in the process our almost two year old Bowler had slipped out the door, off the porch, across the driveway and onto the footpath in front of our neighbour's house.
Thankfully, the Captain was still at the side of the house.
Thankfully, he heard the click of the security door.
Thankfully, he turned his head in time to see the Bowler walking away and could scoop him up before he got closer to the road.
It scared the hell out of us.

Whenever I have heard in the news of a young child being run over by a car, the thought that has often come into my head is "How can that happen?". But probably what I meant really was "How did they let that happen".
Now, that feels like a totally arrogant and judgement laiden thing to have said or thought. Because now I have seen, with my most precious almost two year old, that it can happen in a split second. A moment of inattention, circumstances aligning in a way you don't expect and it can happen so easily.
I'm beating myself up about this tonight.
I feel like I didn't do my job properly.
I know he is ok and nothing bad happened to him. He is so very peacefully asleep in his bed, oblivious.
It still feels awful that he was only a metre from the road.
I know this will feel a little better after a big sleep.
It just felt close. Too close.


Have you ever had a close call like this?


Image courtesy We Heart It

Perfect moment (dreams)

There was a perfect little moment in the day today.
Two boys who like to be together. They are mates, each delighting in the antics of the other.
There was a blanket spread on the floor, a favourite DVD playing.
There were toasted cheese sandwiches and apple juice and beautiful strawberries.
A carpet picnic. They loved it. A "nic nic", the Bowler called it.
There may have even been a little bit of carpet picnic wrestling. Boys are like that.
But I promise it never got out of hand. Not even for a second.

I am noticing the perfect little moments more these days. I reckon they are there if you look.


What perfect little moments have you had this week?

Image via We Heart It

Wordless Wednesday...off and running

One of the sweetest moments in the day...thank you Giggle and Hoot

The end of the day for little ones is nigh.
The Batsman and the Bowler are all clean, bundled in warm pyjamas.
Faces shining, hair still a little damp.
They perch on the couch, books and favourite toys close.
Dinner hour craziness is an escaping memory.
The lure of  a peaceful house beckons.
Little boys eyes are expectant as the Captain and I join them on the couch.
And then it is upon us.
One of the sweetest moments in the day.
As Giggle and Hoot serenade my boys to bed.

Hoots Lullaby

What a day its been, What a magic day Shhhh can you hear the moon is on its way.
It's time for all the stars, that sparkle in your eyes, to fly through the night and light up the sky.
What a day its been, laughing with our friends, now that the sun has sunk into its bed.
It's time for Hoot to go and watch over you at night, fill your head with sweet dreams under soft moon light.
And soon the smiling sun will rise again... and light the way to a bright new day.
"see you in the morning"... hoot hoot

Both the Batsman and the Bowler's eyes light up when Giggle and Hoot grace the screen and especially so during the "goodnight song".

And for me, the proudest mum in the world, it's just one of those wistful, sweet, sweet moments where I receive the gift of watching my children while they are enthralled in something they love.
Sweet, sweet love.

What are the sweetest moments in your day? Do you love Giggle and Hoot?
Image

The Happiness Project and what I learnt from it

This past month I have participated in the Happiness Project, a lovely blogging for life idea hosted by the very gorgeous Naomi at Seven Cherubs. A simple project, the HP required all who participated to keep a one sentence a day journal about what made us happy on that day.

Today is the day when the posts of all those who participated link up in one very happy little gathering.

Here is mine. You can read others who have linked up here.

April 10
A half hour on a rainy Sunday afternoon curled up on the bed with the Batsman, watching the curl of his eyelashes and the delight in his eye as a new book unfolds...and the moment where the Batsman, watching the Captain planting vegetable seedlings with gardening gloves on, races with intent into the bathroom and comes out wearing a hot pink loofah glove, all ready to help with the gardening.
April 11
A half hour on the computer with no interruptions, the Bowler sleeping for almost two hours mid afternoon and a new book purchase on making preserves....jam and jelly here we come.
April 12
The rain drizzling down on the newly planted winter vegie seedlings, two little boys enjoying home made baby cinos, the arrival of beautiful pink cupcake papers, pear and cinnamon pudding baking slowly and a spontaneous rendition of "When You're Happy and You Know it".
April 13
The buzz following my 6am gym workout
April 14
Meeting an old friend and coffee, sweet coffee
April 15
Beautiful photographs hung on the wall by a professional picture hanger....I could sit and look at these photos all day.
April 16
Good coffee.....I'd like some more please.
April 17
Getting to the bottom of the washing basket - small miracle.
April 18
A trip to the gym at 6am (so proud of myself for getting out of bed) and an aquarium visit where the Batsman managed his sensory issues sooooooo well
April 19
The most divine Lebanese dinner with two lovely friends and children that go to bed peacefully on time.
April 20
A wee bit of weight loss and seeing my boy have a red hot go at learning to ride a scooter.
April 21
A little bit of me time with some music, a cup of tea and a gourmet traveller magazine.
April 22
Good Friday fish and chips with friends with chocolate in abundance and an Easter egg hunt with plenty of action
April 23
Making hot cross buns from scratch
April 24
A 12 hour roasted leg of lamb and duck fat roast potatoes.....oooo la la
April 25
A solo walk through the Fitzroy Gardens in the autumn sunshine
April 26
Watching my boys frolic among the autumn leaves and our beautiful Batsman really master his scooter riding.
April 27
Getting my over indulged Easter butt out of bed and to the gym at 6am and a friend offering to take a turn to record minutes at the kinder meeting
April 28
A sparkiling clean house - thanks Marj! - a coffee with my old boss and realising that I don't really miss work and date night with the Captain to see "I Love You Phillip Morris"
April 29
A brilliant report for the Batsman at our 6 monthly developmental paediatrician appointment and a gorgeous, sunshiney Mummy and Batsman excursion to the Queen Victoria Market which produced THE juiciest sweetest strawberries I have ever tasted, a chicken and Chinese rice wine ready for poaching and a calorie free spicy lamb borek that just oozed with flavour.
April 30
A haircut, a massage from the myotherapist and a date night to see a concert at the Melbourne Recital Centre to see these guys.
May 1
The farmers market for fresh chinese greens, a slow day for everyone, some bewdiful chocolate and a snuggle with the Batsman on the couch.
May 2
Getting motivated to do a circuit class at the gym, making it to the other end of the whole gym hour and the Batsman initiating to do a wee in the loo all by himself. Oh, and losing 2.3kg in 3 weeks makes me pretty happy too.
May 3
Ginger cake rich with golden syrup, a playdate for toddlers and a warm bath to soak away the sore muscles from yesterday's exercise class debacle achievement.
May 4
Gym work out and pilates in the one day and a total of 3.3kg dropped in 3 weeks of healthier living
May 5
Poached eggs on toast, alone, and completing the task of wrapping up home made jam and relish for the kinder Mother's Day stall
May 6
Being told by the childcare staff what a joy my Bowler is to look after and how happy and mischievious and inquisitive he is at child care
May 7
The Batsman helping himself become accustomed and less fearful of the dark by playing a lovely pre-bedtime game of "now it's light" and "now it's dark"....joy and excitement and daring are in his voice.
May 8
A mother's day sleep in, cuddles with my boys and a wintry afternoon inside at the beach house, watching the waves chop around and the dark grey clouds roll over us.
May 9
The Batsman's achievements at his OT appointment were many and varied this month and that always makes my heart sing.
May 10
I heart Pilates, stretching and learning to move my body well makes me happy.

So that was my month of happy moments.
And what did I learn from it?
Well.....
I think I already knew what makes me happy but I think what I fell in love with all over again is being present, being in the moment and being there to notice the happy moments. Not rushing so much that they pass you by in a blur. Showing up for the good stuff, trudging through the hard stuff and realising that there is "nowhere to get".

So......what makes me happy are
my kids and my man,
cooking as therapy,
blogging,
looking after myself,
small moments,
friends,
coffee.

I am fortunate. I have a great life. I'm glad I stopped to notice.

Wordless Wednesday - Cake

A week of firsts

It has been a big week of firsts for the Bowler.
First "wave".
First "clapping hands".
First big crawling adventures.
First ride in the car with the car seat facing forward.
Congratulations my little toothy one. Very exciting.
My baby boy is growing up.
With all of the chaos and challenges going on with the Batsman over here I can't blink too often or I just might miss something.
I know you are there my beautiful Bowler and I don't want to miss a thing.

On Mother's Day

I have mixed feelings about Mother’s Day. It is wonderful to have the opportunity to honour and thank my mum for who she is and all that she does. Since the Captain and I became a partnership, it has often been a tricky day with juggling both families, expectations, joint gifts and other associated kerfuffle. I really don’t like the commercialism of the day and the opportunity taken by all retailers everywhere to turn the occasion into yet another gift extravaganza on the calendar and see how many very ordinary pairs of fluffy slippers made in China can make their way into homes across Australia. Yep, mixed feelings.

However, since becoming a mum I am aware now, of what the day means to so many, not as the child, but as the mum. There is a wonderful opportunity to celebrate and be celebrated, to cherish the time spent with your children and partner...a day of love. On Mother’s Day there is sadness too. Sadness for friends who are missing their mums and sadness for those friends who are missing their babies. There is a little sadness for me too as I think of the two twinkling little stars who never quite made it into the world. Yep, more mixed feelings.


Mixed feelings aside, today has been a lovely day. Early morning cuddles from the Batsman and the Bowler and cocoa pops in bed. A bracelet and brooch made by the Batsman at kinder. A handmade card. Chocolate. Cake. More chocolate. Some time with my mum and dad. And a part of the day that is often my very favourite time...a warm, sudsy bath with both my little boys (it’s a big bath!). The warm water relaxes everyone and we spend lots of time blowing bubbles, splashing and singing. Such a lovely day.


My beautiful Batsman and my gorgeous Bowler,
Thank you for being the most lovely boys in the world.
Thank you for somehow finding your way to me and giving me the privilege of being your mum.
For the cuddles and the smiles, the tears and the tumbles, the highs and the lows, the goodnight kisses and the early morning wrestles on the bed – thankyou.
I am so proud of both of you and I know how fortunate I am to have you with me.
I love you.
Mummy xx

A lot going on

These past few weeks have felt like what I imagine it feels like to go through the extended dance mix version of a washing machine cycle. A kind of family and domestic tsunami I guess. Hot, cold, wet, dry, spinning, bubbling and being hung out to dry. So much has been going on and there has not been time to record it in any meaningful way for Segovia so I can pay only brief lip service to it by way of a list:

• storm damage (house and cars) following the almighty Melbourne deluge of March 6
• my dad having a heart valve replacement including significant post operative complications resulting in a second life-saving surgery and extended time in intensive care (he is doing well now)
• a Bowler baby who has slept little during the night (thankfully he seems to be getting his sleep groove happening now - mind you he would need to be at almost 8 months of age). Oh, and the two new teeth are through and grinning proudly.
• a domestic induced shoulder injury for me followed ever so quickly by a lower back injury (both recovering now)
• some significant (but not surprising) news about the Batsman

Just writing down that list feels exhausting and I wonder, really, and marvel, really, that we have made it into April. Amazing. I hope those of you who read here are well and happy and that your March was ever so less eventful than mine.


On the Batsman and his news - that is a rollercoaster all of its own that I will be sharing very soon by way of a new, separate blog. The I Love You Song and other adventures will record that part of our family journey. I don't want to seem too mysterious but for now TILYS will be a private, invitation only blog - at least until I get my head around where we are and what I am saying and some of the complex privacy issues involved. I would love for current readers of Segovia to become followers of The I Love You Song and other adventures so if you would like to do that, please leave me a comment below and I will send you an invitation to read.


In the meantime, I want to share a little bit of brotherly love.