About once a month at our house, we get a phone call asking the Captain or me to participate in a market research study over the phone. I quite like doing the surveys so I often say yes if it won't be too disruptive to the
smooth running chaos of the day. The surveys are on all manner of topics, everything from insurance to politics to media to the quality of particular services. I guess somewhere in my psyche I believe in doing these surveys because while I can whine about the "market" not providing the services and products of high quality that are needed, how will the market know what to provide unless I tell them?
On Saturday afternoon I answered the phone and agreed to do a survey being conducted by the Trust who manages many of the cemeteries and memorial parks in the city where I live.
It was fascinating and has kept me thinking way after the survey ended.
For fifteen minutes a lovely gentleman and I chatted about death and funerals and how I would want myself to be "memorialised" after my death. We talked about burials and cremations. We talked about the costs of these services. We talked about pre-planned funerals. We talked about whether or not I thought it was appropriate that memorial parks and their facilities have multiple community usage for things like festivals, conferences or bereavement education. I expressed the opinion that I don't believe that as a society we "do grief" very well and that I think there is a long way to go to educate the broader populus in how to best support those who are grieving.
The thing that surprised me a little about the survey was how easily and concisely the answers came out of my mouth. Sure, they are things I have thought about and the Captain and I have had bits and pieces of conversation about them but here I was, with a stranger, being completely clear about what I wanted my "after" to look like.
Burial? - no.
Cremation? - yes.
Pre-planned funeral? - great idea but have never got around to doing it
Funeral pre-planned online? - sure.
Ashes in a garden or crypt in the cemetery? - no.
Ashes scattered in a place of natural beauty? - Yes. Yes. Yes.
It felt good not to be conflicted about any of this. It just felt good to know.
Do you do market research stuff? Do you think about questions like these? Do you know the answers?
Postscript: As I finished off this post this morning, a program came on the radio
here to discuss death and dying. An End of Life Forum they called it. It's worth a listen if you are so inclined. xx
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