Tonight, I have an anonymous guest post for you. The post comes from a fellow blogger, who, for reasons which will become obvious as you read it, was unwilling to post this on her own blog. In my view, moral dilemmas make for great blogging so read away and leave some words of wisdom for Anonymous as she tackles this issue.
My friend has a new boyfriend.
I should be happy for her, I should be keen to have them over and to check him out.
But I am not. I am not happy for her, I don't want to meet him.
The relationship started 12 months ago, he is married, with two primary aged children. At the beginning he told her he would never leave his wife and family, he would never hurt them. His marriage was actually pretty great and he didn't want his children to suffer the consequences from a broken marriage.
I suggested she end it. I thought she had, but clearly she just hid it from me instead, knowing I didn't approve.
A few weeks ago he set himself up with a new apartment, changed jobs and then went home and told his wife he didn't love her anymore. He left. Into the arms of my friend, close to 20 years younger than he and his wife.
Imagine.
Apparently the wife is not taking it very well, and being "really difficult".
So here is my dilemma.
Relationships come and go, marriages break up, people fall in love.
Am I being childish? Should I at least meet him, without the voice in my head screaming, "you are a grubby, shit of a husband who treated your wife like crap and left her for the first piece of tight available arse you could get."
Should I be happy for my friend and not judge her as a 'home-wrecker'?
Is it right to be annoyed on behalf of a woman I have never met and don't know?
Am I being all moral high ground-ish? Or, am I right to think that my friend is not displaying traits I want in a friend, she isn't really gaining any respect from anyone and why should I pretend to like this new man, who I think is pretty scummy?
When you lose respect for a friend, can you maintain the friendship?
